What comes to mind for you when you hear the word diet?

If you’re like most people, you probably imagine eating carrot sticks, going to bed hungry, and giving up your favorite food – that’s why so many diets fail. Most people just can’t tolerate those kinds of restrictions for very long.

The more you try to eliminate your favorite foods, the more your feelings of discomfort, deprivation and resentment build up. This can result in bingeing on all the foods you’ve been denying yourself, undoing all of your hard work in a single sitting. But even if you can avoid that problem, are you willing to eat like a rabbit for the rest of your life?

Studies show that 95 percent of people who follow a highly restrictive diet to lose weight will put the weight back on when they return to “normal” eating again. So what’s the alternative? How do you manage to lose weight without eliminating the problem foods and problem behaviors that made you overweight to begin with?

The alternative is moderation—in your eating and, perhaps most importantly, in your thinking.

Practicing moderation in your weight loss program begins with practical strategies, such as counting calories, measuring portions, learning about your nutritional needs, and planning healthy meals. Achieving a reasonable rate of weight loss (about 1-2 pounds per week) by combining a tolerable calorie restriction with exercise is the moderate way to go. Fad diets, eliminating food groups, severely cutting calories and using diet pills are just as extreme as completely denying yourself foods that you enjoy.

The idea is to follow a healthy, balanced and enjoyable nutrition and fitness plan that you can stick with – for life. There’s no “ending the diet” or going back to “normal” eating or anything that will cause you to regain the weight you’ve lost. When you reach your goal weight, all you need to do is gradually increase your caloric intake to a level where you can maintain your weight loss.

Sounds simple, right?

Like many things, it’s not quite as easy as it sounds. Chances are… you want results quickly. And you probably know that your current routine is problematic in one or more ways – too much fast food, sugar, or fat and not enough physical activity. Your natural inclination is going to be making big, sweeping changes to your diet and activity level right away.

Everything in you is clamoring for a very anti-moderate approach. You’re primed to play the extreme diet game, even though your odds of winning are less than five percent. 

To rescue yourself from your own impatience, you need to moderate you thinking. Here are two tips that will help you do that:

1. Food is not the enemy. There are no “good or “bad” foods. True, some foods offer you better nutritional value than others. Refined sugar, for example, provides calories but no other nutrients, while fruit provides vitamins and fiber and comes in a “low-calorie package.” But refined sugar isn’t evil or bad – it can have a place in a healthy diet. When you eat these types of foods, just be mindful not to over eat them. Eating them on special occasions like birthday parties, holidays or limiting them to twice a week is an easy way to incorporate treats into a healthy diet. When you stop labeling foods as good or bad, you won’t feel guilty. Without guilt and deprivation, you’ll be able to break the pattern of cravings, emotional swings, and binges that defeat so many diets. Without all those “diet” rules to follow, you’ll learn to trust your own instincts and make good judgments.
2. Progress, not perfection. To be successful, you don’t have to always have perfect days where things go exactly as you planned. If you eat more or exercise less than you wanted, you can always make up for it over the next several days. Remind yourself that what happens on any one day is not going to make or break all of your efforts. Stop trying to be a perfectionist; this can take the stress out of weight loss.